WWE2K UNIVERSE

Author: Maria Cristina Aguillera

WWF RELEASES NEW POUND-FOR-POUND RANKINGS! CHAOS ENSUES!

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

Yo! The WWF “Mafia” just blinked. After weeks of pure unadulterated criticism from fans, legends, and even congressmen, Vince McMahon has officially scrapped the old, buggy P4P system. They realized you can’t have a computer from 1995 trying to calculate the power of a Hadouken or the impact of a Rock Bottom.

[[ THE NEW SHAPE OF THE UNIVERSE: THE GONZAGA PROTOCOL ]]

Enter Neil John Gonzaga, a brilliant Filipino programmer who the WWF secretly flew to Stamford to “fix” the problem. Gonzaga threw out the “Opinion Metric” and introduced a mathematical standard: THE P4P INDEX.

The Gonzaga Protocol calculates:

  1. Strength of Schedule (SOS): Who did you beat? Was it a jobber or a champion?

  2. Finishing Efficiency (FE): Did you win by DQ, or did you make them quit?

  3. Multiverse Coefficient: How your unique style (Boxing, SF, MMA, WWF) translates against other combat types.

[[ THE OFFICIAL NEW WWF PFP RANKINGS ]]

July 19, 2000 – Initial Release

# Pic Superstar Division Record Last 5 P4P Index
1 Kimbo Slice Heavy 3-0-0 W W W 3.75
2 The Rock Heavy 3-0-0 W W W 2.75
3 Hulk Hogan Heavy 2-0-0 W W 2.25
4 Shane McMahon Heavy 2-0-0 W W 2.00
5 Stone Cold Heavy 2-0-0 W W 2.00
6 Bob Sapp Super 2-0-0 W W 2.00
7 Rob Van Dam Lt. Hvy 2-0-0 W W 1.75
8 Prince Naseem Box 1-0-0 W 1.75
9 Ted DiBiase Heavy 2-0-0 W W 1.75
10 Rickson Gracie MMA 1-0-0 W 1.75

[[ OLD VS. NEW: WHAT CHANGED? ]]

OLD RANK NEW RANK THE SHIFT
#1 Kimbo (8 Score) #1 Kimbo (3.75 Index) Kimbo remains #1, but his dominance is “quantified.” 3-0 with 3 KOs is undeniable, even by a modern computer.
#2 Prince Naseem (4) #8 Prince Naseem (1.75) The Prince took a massive hit. The algorithm says a Featherweight (126lb) win, even a spectacular one, can’t be rated higher than a Heavyweight win in a universal context.
#3 Rickson Gracie (4) #10 Rickson Gracie (1.75) Same issue as Naseem. MMA efficiency is respected, but the “Gracie” name no longer gives automatic top-tier billing.
#4 The Rock (4) #2 The Rock (2.75) THE ASCENSION. Rock is 3-0 against tough opponents (like Triple H and Big Show). The SOS factor rocketed him to #2.
#5 Ted DiBiase (3) #9 Ted DiBiase (1.75) Dropped. Beating local talent doesn’t count as much as the new standard demands.
(New Entry) #3 Hulk Hogan (2.25) The algorithm respect the 2-0 record and the historical magnitude of his wins (Andre, Savage).
(New Entry) #4 Shane McMahon (2.00) SHOCKER. SOS score is high because of his “daredevil” style against big stars. Plus, it’s Shane. The algorithm found a way.

[[ THE MULTIVERSE MELTDOWN: CELEBRITY REACTIONS ]]

I’ve gathered quotes from the biggest names in sports, politics, and the street to see if this new math passes the “Smell Test.”

  • THE ROCK (#2): > “The Rock sees the new list. The Rock sees ‘2.75.’ Finally, the algorithm has come back… to reality! The Great One is 3-0. Kimbo is 3-0. It’s a race to the top. But look at #3… #3 is a legend, but #2 is ‘The People’s Contender.’ Keep calculating, Gonzaga. The math is catching up to the man!”

  • HULK HOGAN (#3): > “Well let me tell you something, programmer John! You got it right, brother! 2-0 is the truth! The 24-inch pythons and Hulkamania are ranked exactly where they belong—at the absolute top of the legends. But watch out, Kimbo… #3 isn’t where Hogan stops!”

  • TRIPLE H (Unranked): > (Irate, reportedly destroying a monitor) > “A recursive loop?! I’M UNRANKED?! Shane is #4 and I’m zero?! This Gonzaga is a fraud! You think your algorithm can factor in a Sledgehammer? You think your index can measure my obsession? If this ‘Mafia’ thinks this list is official, they’re going to find out what ‘Evolution’ really means!”

  • VINCE MCMAHON (Unranked): > “This is progress! The old system was arbitrary, archaic. The new Gonzaga Protocol is scientific, predictable, and fair. As for Shane at #4… well, the numbers don’t lie. He’s a winner! Triple H? He’s currently undergoing a ‘statistical recalibration.'”

  • KEN MASTERS (Unranked): > “I’m not on the list? Fine. The algorithm doesn’t appreciate the flaming Shoryuken. But I’m watching Prince Naseem (#8). He’s the only other guy with the real flair. I’m coming for that spot, purely to look cooler than Ryu on a spreadsheet.”

  • OSCAR DE LA HOYA (Unranked): > “Featherweights are #8? That’s disrespectful. Boxing skill is universal. Naseem should be Top 5. But I’m happy to see the WWF structure finally catching up to the real competitive world.”

  • JOE ROGAN (Analyst): > “Kimbo at #1 is still the absolute correct call. The FE (Finishing Efficiency) metric in the new code confirms it. But Rickson Gracie at #10? That’s going to cause a rift in the jiu-jitsu community. The ‘Gonzaga Protocol’ just declared war on Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.”

  • BOY ABUNDA (Philippines Showbiz): > (Leaning in with profound seriousness) > “Ang bagong listahan… ito ay isang ‘Kuwento ng Katotohanan’ (Story of Truth). Proud ako kay Neil John Gonzaga! Isang Pinoy ang nag-ayos ng gulo! Pero tanong ko lang kay Kimbo: Sino ka sa harap ng iyong sariling index? Who are you, when the computer says you are #1?”

  • KRIS AQUINO (Philippines Showbiz): > “Oh my goodness! I was so emotional! A Filipino programmer fixed the list! 😭 I love you, Neil! But wait, look at The Rock (#2)! So charismatic! And Shane… #4?! That is so nakakagulat (surprising)! But I’m so happy the Philippines is leading the world of tech in WWF!”

[[ THE SHOCKERS: THE WILDCARDS REACT ]]

  1. THE DALAI LAMA: > (Reportedly shown the list by a traveling monk) > “The list shows human desire for order in chaos. Rankings are temporary illusions. Whether one is #1 or #10, the inner P4P index is the true measure. Also, Kimbo seems to be quite the powerful presence.”

  2. KIM JONG IL: > (During the ongoing Inter-Korea Summit) > “The American algorithm places ‘Kimbo’ at the top, but it is incomplete. It lacks a true ‘Kaizen’ of a socialist-trained soldier. I require my heavyweight to be on this list by August. If not, the protocol will be deemed ‘Unfair Sanctions.'”

  3. THE GHOST OF ANDRE THE GIANT: > (Channeling through a medium in Stamford) > “I see Hogan at #3. I am gone, but I am still stronger. The index should have me at infinity. I am watching. You are all so small.”

[[ THE THREAD: MAFIA MATHEMATICS ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

GONZAGA IS THE REAL PFP CHAMPION!! 🖥️ Finally, a system that makes sense. Kimbo vs Rock is the only fight that matters. And Shane McMahon at #4?! That is the greatest troll job in WWF history.

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    Hogan at #3 is a joke! He’s only had two fights in 2000. SOS (Strength of Schedule) doesn’t mean anything if you aren’t active. Prince Naseem got absolutely robbed by this new code.

User: HadoukenKid

Ken Masters wasn’t ranked, but he got the highest “Cool Factor” score (2.5) in the hidden variables. I want to see how Agatom translates into this new index!

User: BeefSlammer69

TRIPLE H LOST IT!! 👊😤 If he’s not on the list, he’s going to make sure nobody is on the list by SummerSlam. This July is going to be the heaviest month ever!

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: I’m hearing that the “Mafia” is already trying to hack the Gonzaga Protocol to artificially increase the scores of the McMahon family. The programmers are currently in a digital shootout with the Stamford mainframe! ]]

THE DALLAS “DEATH LIST” & THE MITB LEAKS: WHO IS CLIMBING THE LADDER?

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

Yo! I just got my hands on a fax that was “accidentally” left in a copier at the WWF headquarters in Stamford. We finally have the rumored names for the Titan Clash and the first-ever Money in the Bank (MITB).

Vince is calling this “The New Era of Opportunism,” but in the locker room, they’re calling it a suicide mission. Here is the leaked July lineup that’s going to change the WWF landscape forever.

[[ THE “TITAN CLASH” FINALIZED CARD ]]

July 23, 2000 – Reunion Arena, Dallas

The 8-man Heavyweight Tournament to crown the #1 Contender for SummerSlam:

  1. Butterbean vs. Birdie: (Boxing vs. Chains—a literal hospital trip waiting to happen).

  2. Sagat vs. The Big Show: (The Emperor of Muay Thai vs. The Largest Athlete in the World).

  3. Yokozuna vs. Rikishi: (The Battle of the Samoan Giants—the ring might actually collapse).

  4. Vader vs. Kane: (Pure Super Heavyweight carnage).

[[ LEAKED: THE 1ST EVER “MONEY IN THE BANK” LINEUP ]]

The “Mafia” wanted a mix of speed, technical brilliance, and absolute madness. These 6 men are reportedly the ones chosen to climb for the briefcase:

  • Rob Van Dam (RVD): The #3 Light Heavyweight and current favorite. If there’s a ladder, RVD is going to jump off it.

  • The Prototype (John Cena): The rookie powerhouse. He’s currently #8 in Light Heavyweight and looking for a “fast track” to the top.

  • Edge: The “Ultimate Opportunist” rumor is starting here. He’s built for this kind of chaos.

  • Christian: Where Edge goes, Christian follows. They’ll likely work together… until they don’t.

  • Chris Benoit: The technical machine. He doesn’t like gimmicks, but he likes winning.

  • Shelton Benjamin: Rumor has it this guy’s athleticism on a ladder is “superhuman.”

THE MECHANICS: The briefcase hangs 20 feet up. Inside is a contract for a World Title Match anytime, anywhere. If you win, you have one year to “cash in.” You could jump the champion during a grocery run or after a 60-minute iron man match. The Undisputed Belt is never safe again.

[[ THE RETURN: BRET “THE HITMAN” HART ]]

After his shocking loss to Yokozuna on March 26th—his first and only sanctioned WWF fight—Bret is back. He’s been silent while Goldberg, The Rock, and Stone Cold took over the headlines.

  • The July Fight: Bret vs. Kurt Angle. Bret wants to prove he’s still the “Excellence of Execution” against the new Olympic blood. He’s never fought the “Big Three” of the new era yet, and word is he’s using this match to scout his next target.

[[ THE WORLD REACTS TO THE MITB CONCEPT ]]

Personality The “Shoot” Reaction
Ryu (SF) “To climb for power instead of earning it through the fist… it is a strange path. But the courage to ascend while being attacked is a warrior’s trait.”
Guile (SF) “It’s an aerial tactical nightmare. You’re a sitting duck on that ladder. I hope these boys have their ‘Flash Kicks’ ready for the mid-air counters.”
The Rock “You think The Rock is scared of a briefcase? You can climb the ladder, grab the case, and open it up just to find a one-way ticket to Smackdown Hotel!”
Stone Cold “Vince wants to legalize muggings? Fine. But if you try to cash in on the Texas Rattlesnake, you’re getting a Stunner before you can even unzip the bag!”
Triple H “It’s a shortcut for cowards. I’ve spent 15 years in the trenches. If some high-flyer thinks he can skip the line, I’ll break his neck at the bottom of the ladder.”
Mike Tyson “It’s a street fight in the sky, man! I love it! It’s like the ‘hood—you always gotta be ready to bang, even when you’re tired.”
Michael Jordan “I took it personally that they didn’t ask me to be the one hanging the case. I’d like to see anyone try to out-jump me for it. 🏀”
Shaq “The ladder would break the second I put a toe on it! But I love the hustle. I’d cash in on Big Show during his lunch break. Give me the BBQ and the belt!”
Kobe Bryant “It’s Mamba Mentality. You find the path to the top while everyone else is fighting on the ground. It’s not a shortcut; it’s an obsession.”

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: I’m hearing that Agatom is also pushing to be the 7th man in the MITB match. Can you imagine the 116-pounder diving from 20 feet up? The Philippines would explode! ]]

Full Hell in a Cell Fight Card Revealed!

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

Yo, the server is absolutely melting. I just got the final, 100% confirmed fight card for tonight’s PPV in Chicago. If you thought the “Boxing Invasion” was wild, wait until you see who just stepped off a plane from Thailand. The “Mafia” has outdone themselves—this is the most “Peak 90s-meets-2000” card in history.

[[ CHICAGO CARNAGE: THE FINAL CARD ]]

1. THE OPENER: STREET FIGHTER REMATCH

Kimbo Slice (2-0) vs. Rey Zulu Jr. (0-2)

  • The Beef: Kimbo is looking for the hat-trick. Zulu Jr. is desperate to prove his lineage isn’t just a memory. Expect bare-knuckle energy and a very short clock. Kimbo is the heavy favorite to go 3-0.

2. UFC WORLD TITLE FIGHT (TRILOGY CLAUSE)

Ken Shamrock (C) vs. Royce Gracie

  • The History: Shamrock took the belt via TKO back on Feb 13th, but the Gracie camp called it a fluke.

  • The Stakes: Pure UFC rules. No ropes, no pins, just tap or nap. There is a rematch clause in the contract—if Royce wins, we’re looking at the ultimate trilogy fight in July.

3. UFC #1 CONTENDER MATCH

Kurt Angle vs. Shane McMahon

  • The Vibe: Mid-card chaos. Angle is the favorite, but Shane-O-Mac has been training with “secret shooters.” The winner gets the next shot at the Shamrock/Gracie winner. Shane’s black eye from training is proof he’s taking this “shoot” seriously.

4. THE “IDENTITY” WAR (EXTREME RULES)

Mad Dogg vs. The Ultimate Warrior

  • The Weapon: The “Outback Shredder” (that serrated steel surfboard) has been spotted at ringside. Mad Dogg wants the name. Warrior wants to protect the myth. This is going to be the bloodiest match of the night.

5. THE SURPRISE DEBUT: THE EMPEROR VS. THE GIANT

Sagat (0-0) vs. Kevin Nash (0-1)

  • The Shocker: It’s HIM. 7’4″, eye patch, and a massive scar across his chest (rumor is a kid in a gi gave it to him in Japan). This is Sagat’s first time on US soil and his first pro-wrestling sanctioned match.

  • The Corners: Sagat has Ken Masters, Adon, and Gen in his corner. Nash is backed by Hulk Hogan and the newly signed Scott Hall. The “Wolfpac” vs. “Muay Thai Royalty.” This is legendary.

6. THE MAIN EVENT: HELL IN A CELL

The Undertaker vs. Mick Foley

  • The Controversy: Despite the “Vocal Minority” of fans protesting the safety of the match, the Cell is lowering. Foley is reportedly refusing medical checks. Taker is silent. Chicago is ready for a funeral.

[[ THE THREAD: PPV PREDICTIONS ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

SAGAT IS HERE?! 🐯 Scar and all! Seeing him stand next to Kevin Nash is gonna be insane. Nash is 0-1 and he’s facing a guy who can throw Tiger Shots? RIP Big Sexy. Also, Scott Hall joining Hogan? The nWo is basically invading the Street Fighter camp.

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    Ken Masters being in Sagat’s corner is the real twist. I thought they hated each other! 🕵️‍♂️ Maybe the “WWF Mafia” is so strong they had to team up. And Kimbo 3-0 is a lock. Zulu Jr. doesn’t have the chin for it.

User: HadoukenKid

The chest scar on Sagat looks fresh. 🐉 If Nash hits a Jackknife Powerbomb on that scar, Sagat might actually explode. But with Gen and Adon there? No one is interfering in that match. That’s a hit-squad.

User: BeefSlammer69

FOLEY IN THE CELL!! 🎭 I don’t care about the protestors. I want to see the tacks. I want to see the blood. And I want to see Sagat Tiger Uppercut Hogan off the apron!! 👊😤

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: I’m hearing Scott Hall might try to “Survey the Group” during the Sagat match. Keep your eyes on the entrance ramp. The Allstate Arena is about to explode! ]]

EXCLUSIVE: THE STREET FIGHTERS BREAK THEIR SILENCE! (LEAKED INTERVIEWS)

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

Yo, everyone! I’ve been scouring the Japanese BBS boards and chasing leads in the Hong Kong underground for weeks. We finally tracked down some of the “World Warriors” to get their take on the WWF’s circus.

And yes… we even found a lead on Ken Masters. He isn’t “hiding”—he’s just living a life we can’t afford. Check the transcripts below.

[[ INTERVIEW 1: RYU – THE ETERNAL WANDERER ]]

Location: A secluded dojo outside of Kyoto. Ryu was found practicing kata under a waterfall.

REPORTER: “Ryu, Vince McMahon called you a ‘clown’ and says you’re ducking the WWF legends. What’s your response?”

RYU: (Long silence. He doesn’t even look at the camera.)

“McMahon speaks of ‘entertainment.’ I speak of the path. A true warrior does not seek a belt made of gold or a contract signed in ink. He seeks the answer in the heart of battle. If Hogan or Austin wish to find me, they do not need a promoter. They only need to walk the path. But warn them… the ‘Hadoken’ does not care about their TV ratings. It only knows the truth.”

REPORTER: “What do you think about the ‘Hell in a Cell’ match in Chicago?”

RYU:

“A cage is just a box for those who are afraid of the wind. To trap yourself in steel with another man is not a test of spirit—it is a test of desperation. I have fought on the edge of volcanoes and in the rain of Thailand. A cage cannot contain a real warrior.”

[[ INTERVIEW 2: CHUN-LI – THE INTERPOL OFFICER ]]

Location: Interpol HQ, Lyon. She was reviewing files on the “WWF Mafia” rumors.

CHUN-LI:

“The boxing invasion? It’s a mess. Prince Naseem and Butterbean are talented, but they’re being used as pawns in a power struggle between promoters. As for the WWF… my investigation into ‘Shadaloo’ connections is ongoing. There are certain ‘executives’ in that federation whose finances don’t add up. If they think they can hide behind a ‘Hell in a Cell,’ they’re wrong. Justice has a long reach—longer than Giant Gonzalez.”

[[ THE “FINDING KEN” MISSION: KEN MASTERS ]]

We finally tracked Ken down at a high-end beach resort in Malibu. He was training, but mostly he was lounging by a pool with a laptop (probably checking his stocks).

REPORTER: “Ken! People say you’re ducking the WWF. Vince says you’re scared of the ‘Genetic Power’ of a McMahon.”

KEN MASTERS: (Adjusts sunglasses, grins that million-dollar smile)

“Scared? Tell Vince I’ve got more ‘Genetic Power’ in my pinky than his whole roster has in their steroid-cabinet. I’m not ducking anyone. I’m just expensive, baby! If the WWF wants the ‘Masters’ touch, they gotta stop offering me ‘mid-card’ money. I’m 2-0 in life, and I’m 100-0 in the ring.

“As for the Chicago Cell… tell Mick Foley I respect the hustle, but he’s taking too many hits to the head. He should come out to Malibu, have a drink, and learn how to fight without getting his ear ripped off. And Shane McMahon? Fighting Angle under UFC rules? That’s the funniest thing I’ve heard all year. I’ll be watching from my yacht. Good luck, Shane-o! You’re gonna need it.”

[[ THE REACTION THREAD ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

“I’m expensive, baby!” 🤣 Ken is such a legend. He basically just called the whole WWF roster poor. And Ryu? “A cage is just a box.” DAMN. He just roasted the entire Hell in a Cell concept in one sentence. 🌋🔥

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    Ken is a show-off, but he’s right about Shane. Shane is gonna get folded by Angle. And Ryu is too “zen” for his own good. I want to see him hit a Hadoken on the Undertaker and see if the “Deadman” stays down.

User: HadoukenKid

Chun-Li investigating the WWF Mafia? 🕵️‍♀️ I KNEW IT. The Shadaloo connection is real. M. Bison is probably the one funding DiBiase’s “Million Dollar” lifestyle. This goes deeper than we thought, guys. #InterpolInTheRing

User: BeefSlammer69

Ryu say cage is box. Box is for cereal. Meat is for Butterbean. Bean is better than Ryu. Bean punch waterfall!! 👊😤

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: The Allstate Arena is officially sold out for Chicago. The rumors of a “Surprise Guest” at the Cell are peaking. Is it a Street Fighter? Is it Goldberg? Or is it something darker? ]]

*** [ WWF_UNDERGROUND_FORUM ] *** Topic: BOXING WORLD MELTDOWN: TYSON, DON KING, & DE LA HOYA REACT TO VEGAS!

[ ADMIN_NEIL ] – Posted: June 9, 2000 @ 11:58 PM

Yo, the 56k is screaming tonight! I just got the transcripts from the post-fight pressers in Vegas. The boxing community is absolutely LOSING IT. Half of them think Naz and Bean are heroes, and the other half (mostly the promoters) are terrified that the “WWF Mafia” is gonna eat their sport alive.

Here are the exclusive quotes from the biggest names in the “Sweet Science.”

[[ MIKE TYSON: “THE BADDEST MAN” WEIGHS IN ]]

Location: Ringside, Las Vegas.

“Listen, man… Butterbean is a beast. People underestimate him because of his shape, but that overhand right is ‘lights out’ for anyone. Seeing him throw and kick? That’s some street-fight energy right there. And Naz… Naz is a warrior. He went into the shadow of a giant and found a way to win. It wasn’t boxing, it was survival. I respect it. If Vince wants to keep this ‘Invasion’ going, he better call me. I’ve got some ‘Genetic Power’ for him too.”

[[ DON KING: THE HYPE MACHINE IN A PANIC ]]

Location: A private suite at the MGM Grand.

“It is a travesty! A tragedy! A monumental catastrophe of athletic proportions! Prince Naseem Hamed is a world-class pugilist, a king of the ring, and he is out there doing… what? Flip-flops and dropkicks? This is the WWF’s ‘Shadaloo’ influence corrupting the integrity of the Sweet Science! They are trying to turn our champions into circus performers! I will be filing injunctions! I will be filing lawsuits! Only in America can you see a Giant try to sit on a Prince, but it is BAD FOR BUSINESS!”

[[ OSCAR DE LA HOYA: THE GOLDEN BOY’S DOUBTS ]]

Location: Training camp in Big Bear.

“I respect Naz’s heart, but the Lucha Libre stuff? Come on. Boxing is about discipline and footwork, not jumping off the ropes. He entering at 158 lbs showed he was worried about the weight difference. I’m glad he won, but he looked hurt. If Gonzalez had any actual boxing skill, Naz wouldn’t have made it out of the first round. I’m staying in the ring; the WWF is a mess right now.”

[[ THE BOXING FORUM REPLIES (MIRRORED FROM BOXINGSCENE2000) ]]

User: Gloved_Up_88

Don King is just mad he isn’t getting a cut of the WWF gate. 💸 Butterbean looked like a MMA fighter out there! The kick to Choi’s leg was the beginning of the end. Boxing is evolving, and the “Peak 90s” legends are the ones who can’t keep up.

User: Iron_Chin_Tony

TYSON VS HOGAN. MAKE IT HAPPEN. 🥊🔥 If Tyson enters the WWF, the ratings will explode. Naz winning with a pinfall is the craziest thing I’ve ever seen. My dad almost threw his remote through the TV. He says it’s all a “work” to make wrestling look legit.

User: SweetScience_Purist

This “Invasion” is a joke. 🤡 Naz using dropkicks is an insult to every trainer he’s ever had. He’s an undefeated champion, not a stuntman. If he keeps this up, he’s gonna get a career-ending injury in a “non-sanctioned” brawl. Keep the boxers in the ring and the actors in the WWF.

[[ ADMIN_NEIL’S INSIDER UPDATE: THE BEAN GAUNTLET ]]

My sources say the Big Boss Man is furious about Butterbean’s win. He’s been telling the locker room that “a round mound can’t take down the Law.”

  • June 11 (Vegas): Butterbean vs. Boss Man (BMF Rules).

  • The Odds: Bean is the favorite, but Boss Man is reportedly bringing his nightstick… even though it’s “illegal.”

[[ WARNING: The Chicago “Hell in a Cell” servers are under heavy load. If you want the live stream, make sure your RealPlayer is updated to version 7.0! ]]

*** [ WWF_UNDERGROUND_FORUM ] *** Topic: THE “CHICAGO CARNAGE” PRE-MATCH TAPES: FOLEY’S DESCENT & THE MISSING MAVERICK

[ ADMIN_NEIL ] – Posted: June 12, 2000 @ 02:45 AM

Yo, the server is barely holding on! I just got the final audio leak from the Allstate Arena locker rooms. If you thought the May results were a fluke, the energy in Chicago is different. It’s not “Entertainment” anymore; it’s a funeral march.

[[ THE FOLEY INTERVIEW: “NOBODY HOME” ]]

Location: A dimly lit boiler room under the Allstate Arena. The Vibe: Mick Foley isn’t wearing the tie-dye or the white button-down. He’s sitting in a corner, rocking back and forth with a leather mask half-on. He looks… broken.

REPORTER: “Mick, people are worried. The Commission said you have three broken ribs. Why go back into the Cell with the Undertaker?”

MICK FOLEY: (Voice is a raspy, high-pitched whisper—total Mankind vibes)

“Worried? Hehe… they should be worried about the steel. The steel is cold, but it’s the only thing that feels real anymore. The Undertaker took my pride in May, but he forgot to take my soul. In Chicago, I’m not going in there to ‘wrestle.’ I’m going in there to see if I can still feel the pain. If I fall again… if the roof breaks… just make sure my kids know that Daddy was the only one brave enough to smile in the dark.”

REPORTER: “Is Cactus Jack coming to Chicago?”

MICK FOLEY: (Suddenly dead silent. He looks directly into the lens with a cold, sane stare.)

“Cactus Jack is dead. Mrs. Foley’s baby boy is all that’s left. And he’s bringing the tacks.”

[[ THE “MISSING MAVERICK” LEAK: KEN MASTERS ]]

We finally cornered Ken Masters as he was boarding a private jet in Vegas. He looked annoyed, mostly because we interrupted him talking to a group of swimsuit models.

REPORTER: “Ken! The ‘World Warriors’ say you’re hiding from the WWF’s ‘Mafia’ pressure. Are you ducking the Chicago card?”

KEN MASTERS: (Flips his hair, laughing)

“Ducking? Please. I’m ‘training,’ okay? It’s called ‘Active Recovery.’ I’m scouting the competition from the sky. Look, I saw what happened to Gonzalez. I saw Naz using those Lucha moves. It’s cute, but it’s sloppy. I’m not ‘hiding’—I’m waiting for the check to clear. Tell Vince if he wants a REAL American hero to save his Chicago gate, he knows my number. Until then, tell Ryu to keep punching water; I’ll keep punching champagne corks. See ya!”

[[ THE THREAD: CHICAGO PREDICTIONS ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

Foley is GONE. 🧠 Did you hear that whisper? He’s officially lost it. The “Deadman” is gonna finish the job this time. Also, Ken is such a troll. 🤣 “Active Recovery” at a beach resort? He’s 100% ducking the Street Fighter investigation Chun-Li is doing.

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    I don’t care if he’s crazy, Foley with thumbtacks is the most dangerous man in the world. And don’t sleep on Mad Dogg (Road Kill). If he takes the “Warrior” name from Ultimate Warrior, the 90s are officially over.

User: HadoukenKid

Ken is ducking because he knows the Shadaloo money is drying up. 🕵️‍♂️ Why else would he be “scouting from the sky”? He’s looking for an exit strategy. Meanwhile, Ryu is actually training. The “Eternal Wanderer” vs Undertaker is the match we NEED.

User: BeefSlammer69

FOLEY TALK TO MASK. MASK SAY HI. 🎭 I want to see the tacks!! If Taker lands on the tacks, he will scream like a girl. Butterbean is in Chicago too? BEAN VS TAKER IN THE CAGE!! 👊😤

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: The “Shane vs Angle” UFC-style match is being called a “Shoot” by my sources. No scripts, no plan. Shane is legitimately trying to knock him out. This is gonna be a car crash. ]]

*** [ WWF_UNDERGROUND_FORUM ] *** Topic: LEAKED: THE “OUTBACK SHREDDER” MANIFESTO (MAD DOGG’S EXTREME GEAR)

[ ADMIN_NEIL ] – Posted: June 13, 2000 @ 11:15 PM

Yo, the 56k is struggling to download these blueprints! I just got a fax (yeah, a real fax) from a contact in the Chicago Allstate Arena loading dock. Mad Dogg (f.k.a. Road Kill) isn’t just bringing a kendo stick or a chair. He’s bringing a custom-built nightmare from the Australian indie circuit.

The Commission is trying to ban it, but since it’s an “Extreme Rules” match, their hands are tied. Check the specs on this “Outback Shredder.”

[[ EQUIPMENT LEAK: THE OUTBACK SHREDDER ]]

  • Base: A 6-foot industrial-grade steel surfboard, reinforced with galvanized zinc.

  • The “Shredder” Element: The edges are serrated like a shark’s tooth. It looks like it was ripped off a combine harvester in the Outback.

  • The “Barbed Wire Wrap”: One side is wrapped in triple-strand rusted wire.

  • The Weight: Roughly 85 lbs. It’s a weapon, a shield, and a platform for top-rope splashes.

Mad Dogg’s Note to the Ring Crew:

“Tell the ‘Ultimate’ one that in the bush, we don’t pray to the heavens. We survive the dirt. This board is gonna carve a new name into his forehead. The 90s are over. The Mad Dogg is hungry.”

[[ THE ANALYST’S “SURVIVAL” FORECAST ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

A SERRATED SURFBOARD?! 🏄‍♂️💀 Mad Dogg is literally trying to turn the Warrior into sashimi. This is ECW on steroids. If the Warrior doesn’t bring his ‘God Power’ fast, he’s getting shredded. I bet 10 bucks the match doesn’t last 10 minutes.

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    Warrior has survived everything. He’s gonna press-slam that board out of the ring. But yeah, “Extreme Rules” favors the younger, crazier guy. Mad Dogg is 320 lbs of Australian beef. Warrior hasn’t felt impact like that since ’92.

User: HadoukenKid

Why is the WWF allowing this but banning “Street Fighter” techniques? 🕵️‍♂️ A serrated surfboard is “legal” but a Hadoken is “dangerous”? The Mafia logic is so broken. They want the carnage, but they want to control who does it.

User: BeefSlammer69

BOARD IS SHARP. MEAT IS SOFT. 🥩 Mad Dogg cuts the Warrior like a steak. I want to see the “Outback Shredder” vs the “Million Dollar Dream.” DiBiase vs a surfboard!! 👊😤

[[ BREAKING: BUTTERBEAN VS BOSS MAN UPDATE ]]

The Vegas results are coming in over the wire! Butterbean just finished his match with The Big Boss Man.

  • The Result: Bean by K.O. in the 2nd round.

  • The Drama: Boss Man tried to use the nightstick, but Bean ducked it and landed a body-shot that literally lifted Boss Man off his feet.

  • The Streak: Bean is now 3-0. Up next? Viscera on June 18th. The “Gauntlet” is real.

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: I’m setting up the live chat for the Chicago PPV. If you want the link, you gotta have a verified ICQ number. Don’t let the “Mafia” bots in! ]]

*** [ WWF_UNDERGROUND_FORUM ] ***

Topic: [CORRECTION] THE BEAN GAUNTLET & CHICAGO FINAL PREP

[ ADMIN_NEIL ] – Posted: June 14, 2000 @ 10:30 PM

Yo, my bad on the last update! The 56k must have glitched or I’m reading the wrong IRC logs. A few of you called me out—Butterbean hasn’t fought the Boss Man yet. The “King of the 4-Rounders” is still sitting at 1-0 in the WWF after that clinical destruction of Hongman Choi. The Vegas card was just the beginning. The “Gauntlet” hasn’t officially started, but the heat between the boxers and the “Law” is definitely bubbling over.

[[ UPDATED ODDS: THE BOXING INVASION (JUNE 11-18) ]]

Vegas just released the fresh numbers. Since the “Mafia” rumors are dead and the fights are confirmed, here is where the money is moving:

Matchup Status Current Odds
Butterbean vs. Big Boss Man JUNE 11 (Vegas) Bean (-210) / Boss Man (+170)
Prince Naseem vs. (TBD) Scouting Naz is 1-0, looking for a Lucha-hybrid rival.
Butterbean vs. Viscera JUNE 18 (Rumored) Bean (-105) / Viscera (-115)

Analyst Note: The smart money is on Bean against Boss Man, but the house is worried about Boss Man’s “Department of Corrections” tactics. If it’s BMF rules, anything goes.

[[ THE MAD DOGG / WARRIOR “HARDWARE” LIST ]]

Since the “Outback Shredder” blueprints leaked, the Ultimate Warrior’s camp has been silent.

  • Mad Dogg (Road Kill) has officially checked into his Chicago hotel.

  • The Gear: Along with the Shredder, he’s requested 4 rolls of heavy-duty industrial tape and a “rusted steel bucket.”

  • The Vibe: This isn’t a wrestling match. This is an Australian “identity theft” attempt.

[[ THE THREAD: CHICAGO CARNAGE ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

My bad, Admin! I was wondering why I didn’t see Bean on the Heat highlights yet. 😅 If he’s 1-0, that means Choi was his only victim so far. Boss Man is gonna be a way different test. Boss Man actually knows how to take a punch.

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    Doesn’t matter if he’s 1-0 or 10-0, Bean hits like a truck. 🚛 Boss Man is gonna get his badge dented. And thanks for the correction on the Warrior match—Mad Dogg is definitely the dark horse of June.

User: HadoukenKid

Ken Masters is still M.I.A. 🕵️‍♂️ I think he’s waiting to see if Naz survives June before he commits to a WWF contract. The “Street Fighters” are playing it smart. They let the boxers take the hits first to see if the “Mafia” plays fair.

User: BeefSlammer69

BEAN IS 1-0. ONE PUNCH. ONE WIN. 🥩 June 11 is Boss Man’s funeral. I’m buying the PPV just to see the “Outback Shredder.” Mad Dogg is my new hero. 🇦🇺💪

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: I’m double-checking the medical reports for Foley again. If he’s 1-0 in May but 0-1 in spirit, the Cell is gonna be a slaughterhouse. Stick to the #WWF_LEAKS channel for the most accurate timestamps! ]]

*** [ WWF_UNDERGROUND_FORUM ] *** Topic: THE “MAD DOGG” MANIFESTO: FINAL PRE-FIGHT LEAKS FROM CHICAGO

[ ADMIN_NEIL ] – Posted: June 15, 2000 @ 11:50 PM

Yo! The Allstate Arena is basically a fortress tonight. I managed to get one last digital audio clip (thanks, Napster!) of Mad Dogg (the artist formerly known as Road Kill) as he was prepping that “Outback Shredder.” He’s not just here for a win; he’s here for a career.

Check the transcript of his final words before he heads into the “Extreme Rules” war with the legend.

[[ THE MAD DOGG INTERVIEW: “THE NAME IS MINE” ]]

Location: Loading Dock 4, Allstate Arena. The Vibe: He’s covered in Aussie-flag face paint, but it’s grittier than the Warrior’s. He’s sharpening the serrated edges of his steel surfboard with a literal rock.

REPORTER: “You’ve taken the name ‘Mad Dogg’ from a legend in the indies. Now you’re trying to take the name ‘Warrior’ from the Ultimate one. Why this obsession with names?”

MAD DOGG: (Growsls, looking into the camera with wild eyes)

“Obsession? No, mate. It’s evolution. In the Outback, if a dingo is old and slow, the young pup takes his territory. The ‘Ultimate’ one hasn’t been relevant since the 90s. He lives in the clouds, talking to spirits. I live in the dirt. I live in the ‘Extreme.’ Tonight, I’m not just beating him. I’m shredding the myth. When I’m done with him on this board, there won’t be an ‘Ultimate’ anything left. Just a Mad Dogg standing over a pile of tassels.”

REPORTER: “And the Shredder? Is that legal?”

MAD DOGG:

“It’s Chicago, mate. It’s ‘Extreme Rules.’ If it draws blood, it’s legal. Tell the little Warriors to cover their eyes. The ‘Outback Shredder’ is hungry.”

[[ THE THREAD: CHICAGO CARNAGE ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

“I live in the dirt.” 🐕🇦🇺 Mad Dogg is terrifying. I’ve seen his ECW tapes—the guy doesn’t feel pain. If Warrior tries that “Spirit of the Heavens” stuff, Mad Dogg is just gonna hit him with a steel surfboard. I’m calling it: Mad Dogg wins via total destruction.

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    People keep disrespecting the Warrior. He’s 90s-peak for a reason! He’s faced giants, monsters, and Hulk Hogan. A punk with a surfboard isn’t gonna stop the power of the Warrior. But yeah… that surfboard looks like it could cut through a tank. 💀

User: HadoukenKid

Ryu said a cage is a box for the afraid. Mad Dogg says the dirt is where the truth is. The “World Warriors” are all starting to sound the same. 🕵️‍♂️ Maybe they’re all training at the same secret camp? Either way, tonight’s “Extreme Rules” match is gonna make the Cell look like a playground.

User: BeefSlammer69

SHRED THE MEAT!! 🥩 Mad Dogg is the man. If he wins, he should fight Butterbean. Surfboard vs Punch! That’s the real main event. 👊😤

[[ ADMIN_NEIL’S FINAL LOOK AT THE CARD ]]

  • The Rock vs. Doink: Rock is 2-0, but if Doink uses “Clown Tactics,” it could be a mess.

  • Shane vs. Angle: Shane’s black eye is confirmed. He’s going into a shoot-fight with a broken face.

  • The Cell: Foley is reportedly refusing to wear a cup or extra padding. He wants to “feel the steel.”

[[ WARNING: The live stream link is in the #CHICAGO_CARNAGE IRC channel. If you don’t have a fast modem, don’t even try it. See you on the other side! ]]

THE EVOLUTION: FROM ROAD KILL TO MAD DOGG. plus HELL IN A CELL: THE ANALYST WEIGH-IN

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

For the uninitiated, the Australian indie scene operates on a “Highlander” philosophy: The Name can be taken. * The Backstory: After a brutal “Extreme Rules” encounter in ECW, the man formerly known as Road Kill defeated the previous title-holder of the “Mad Dogg” moniker.

  • The New Threat: Now known as Mad Dogg, this 320lb hybrid-style punk is bringing that same “Winner-Takes-The-Identity” energy to the WWF. He isn’t just trying to beat the Ultimate Warrior; he’s trying to become the only Warrior left in the industry.

[[ HELL IN A CELL: THE ANALYST WEIGH-IN ]]

Analyst Match: Taker vs. Foley II Match: Shane vs. Angle (UFC Rules)
Joe Rogan “Foley is fighting on pure adrenaline and ‘Cactus Jack’ spirit. But Taker in a cage? That’s his house. If Foley doesn’t end it in 10 mins, he’s leaving on a stretcher.” “Shane is crazy, but Angle is a machine. In a shoot-fight, Angle wins 100 times out of 100. Shane is looking for a ‘miracle strike’ that isn’t coming.”
Dave Meltzer “The Commission is gambling with Foley’s health. The first match was a 5-star war, but a rematch inside the Cell so soon? This is a ‘Mafia’ move to generate a buy-rate.” “This is Shane’s attempt to legitimize the McMahon name after Vince’s ‘respectable’ loss to Austin. He wants to prove ‘Genetic Power’ works in the Octagon.”
Bill Apter “Expect a slower, more psychological battle. Both men are too hurt for another 20-foot stunt. Taker wins via a Tombstone on the steel.” “Angle is too disciplined. He’ll take Shane down, control the hips, and force a submission within the first round. It’ll be clinical.”

[[ THE FAN POLLS: WHO EMERGES VICTORIOUS? ]]

Data taken from the https://www.google.com/search?q=WWF.com “Instant Vote” and IRC #WWF_LEAKS channel.

1. The Ultimate Warrior vs. Mad Dogg (Extreme Rules)

  • Ultimate Warrior: 62% (“The power of the Heavens is too much!”)

  • Mad Dogg: 38% (“The Amish Punk is too wild for an old legend.”)

2. Ken Shamrock vs. Royce Gracie (Non-Title Rematch)

  • Ken Shamrock: 51% (“The World’s Most Dangerous Man has the UFC rage.”)

  • Royce Gracie: 49% (“Jiu-Jitsu always finds a way. The Gi is a weapon.”)

3. The Undertaker vs. Mick Foley (Hell in a Cell)

  • The Undertaker: 74% (“The Deadman doesn’t lose twice in Chicago.”)

  • Mick Foley: 26% (“The Hardcore Legend has one more miracle in him.”)

[[ THE THREAD: CHICAGO CARNAGE PREDICTIONS ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

Mad Dogg is a beast. 🐕 He doesn’t care about the Warrior’s “destiny.” He’s gonna use those Extreme Rules to turn the ring into a junkyard. And Shane vs Angle? I bet my 56k modem that Shane pulls out some “illegal” move to win. The McMahons don’t play fair in “UFC” rules.

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    You’re dreaming. Angle is a 2-0 predator. He’s gonna snap Shane’s ankle before the pyro even clears. Also, I’m legit worried for Foley. If Taker throws him off that cage again, I’m turning off the TV. 📺😭

User: HadoukenKid

Why is no one talking about the USA Belt Finals? Savage vs DiBiase is gonna be the most “Peak 90s” match ever. Meanwhile, the real killers like Kimbo and Sapp are stuck in the mid-card. The “Mafia” is protecting the legends, I’m telling you. #SavageIsABye

User: BeefSlammer69

BUTTERBEAN EVERY WEEK!! 🥩 If Bean beats Boss Man on June 11, I want him to jump into the Cell and punch Taker. Bean for Undisputed Champ! 👊😤

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: The Chicago Allstate Arena has added extra security for the “Extreme Rules” match. Word is Mad Dogg is bringing some ‘Australian Hardware’ to the ring. ]]

“CHICAGO CARNAGE” PREVIEW

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

*** [ WWF_UNDERGROUND_FORUM ] *** Topic: JUNE “CHICAGO CARNAGE” PREVIEW: SHANE-O-MAC TRAINING LEAK / THE PRINCE SPEAKS / THE BEAST’S GAUNTLET

[ ADMIN_NEIL ] – Posted: June 6, 2000 @ 11:20 PM

Yo, the Vegas dust hasn’t even settled and Chicago is already looking like a bloodbath. If you thought May was wild, June is about to break the internet (and my server). I’ve got the latest leaks on Shane’s “UFC” prep, the lowdown on this “Road Kill” guy, and the fallout from Naz’s win.

[[ LEAKED: SHANE MCMAHON TRAINING FOOTAGE ]]

I just got a 5MB .AVI clip of Shane training at a “secret location” (looks like a warehouse in Greenwich).

  • The Footage: Shane isn’t just jumping off stuff. He’s drilling double-leg takedowns and sprawl-and-brawl defense with actual shooters. He’s leaner, faster, and looks obsessed.

  • The Rumor: Word is he’s hired a “Gray-Market” catch wrestler to help him survive Kurt Angle. He knows he can’t out-wrestle an Olympian, so he’s training for “Terminal Impact”—one big, high-risk move to end it.

[[ WHO IS ROAD KILL? ]]

For everyone asking about the guy fighting the Ultimate Warrior:

  • The Profile: Road Kill isn’t just some “Australian punk.” He’s a 320lb Amish-themed brawler trained by Tazz and Perry Saturn at the House of Hardcore.

  • The Style: He’s a “Hardcore Hybrid”—he can do top-rope splashes (the “Amish Splash”) but has the raw power of a tractor.

  • The Beef: He claims the “Ultimate Warrior” name belongs to the fans, not a “90s relic.” This isn’t a wrestling match; it’s a collision.

[[ PRINCE NASEEM HITS BACK AT THE ROCK ]]

After The Rock called the boxers “cute” and told them to stop “playing crossover,” Naz went off on a UK radio show:

“The Rock talks about ‘Electrifying’? Tell him to come to the ring without his scriptwriters and see how electrifying a left hook to the liver feels. He’s fighting clowns and pies while I’m pinning 7-foot giants. He’s a movie star; I’m a fighter. If he wants to see ‘The People’s Champion,’ he can look at my reflection in his sunglasses.”

[[ STONE COLD RECOVERY STATUS ]]

Austin is currently “dark.” No interviews, no sightings.

  • The Intel: His neck took a massive hit during the McMahon match (that first Stunner counter was brutal). He’s reportedly in a private facility in Texas. Some say he’s “compromised,” but others say he’s just waiting for the SummerSlam brackets to finalize so he can hunt whoever is left standing.

[[ THE BUTTERBEAN GAUNTLET ]]

After destroying Choi, the “King of the 4-Rounders” is fighting every week. Here is the rumored schedule:

  • June 11: vs. The Big Boss Man (BMF Rules – The ultimate “Wall vs. Wall” fight)

  • June 18: vs. Viscera (Super-Heavyweight Clash)

  • June 25: vs. Mark Henry (The “World’s Strongest Man” vs. The “World’s Hardest Puncher”)

[[ THE THREAD: JUNE PREDICTIONS ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

Road Kill is gonna eat the Warrior for breakfast. 🍗 Have you seen him in ECW? He’s a tank. Warrior hasn’t fought a guy like that since… ever. Also, Naz 1-0 in the WWF is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen. The “Mafia” must be furious that their giant got pinned by a featherweight. 🤣

  • Reply: HulksterMania_316

    STFU. Warrior is a force of nature. Road Kill is just a guy in overalls. 🚜 And Naz got lucky. If Gonzalez didn’t gape at him like a statue, Naz would be in a body cast. Boxing is still a joke.

User: MMA_Junky_Ken

Shane fighting Angle under UFC rules is suicide. 💀 I don’t care how many “secret shooters” he trains with. Angle is a machine. If this isn’t a “work,” Shane is leaving the Allstate Arena in an ambulance.

User: BeefSlammer69

Butterbean vs Boss Man!! Meat fight!! 🥩 Bean punches him into the 90s. Boss Man is too slow. Bean is 3-0 by next week. 👊😤

[[ ADMIN NOTE: I’m setting up a private IRC room for the Chicago PPV. If you want the password, you gotta contribute to the server costs. Don’t be a leecher! ]]

WWF ARCHIVE: June 2000 “Las Vegas Lockdown” Results

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

The Las Vegas Lockdown has officially concluded, and the combat sports world is reeling. While the WWF prepares for the “Chicago Carnage” of Hell in a Cell, the 56k modems are melting down over the results from Nevada. The “Boxing Invasion” wasn’t just a gimmick—it was a demolition.

Here is the restored archive from June 5, 2000.

WWF ARCHIVE: June 2000 “Las Vegas Lockdown” Results

Author: Neil Kim Park (Senior Fight Historian)

1. The “Beast” Unleashed: Butterbean vs. Hongman Choi

Result: Butterbean def. Hongman Choi via K.O. (3:22)

The Analysis: In a performance that erased any doubt about boxing power, Butterbean dismantled the 7’2″ Choi in less than three minutes. Surprisingly, Bean showcased a “hybrid” style, utilizing clinch-throws and heavy leg kicks that gassed the giant early. After three massive knockdowns, Choi was unable to answer the 10-count.

  • The Fallout: Butterbean has officially entered the “June Gauntlet.” He is scheduled to fight every week this month to prove the “Sweet Science” is the supreme discipline.

2. The Miracle in the Desert: Prince Naseem vs. Giant Gonzalez

Result: Prince Naseem Hamed def. Giant Gonzalez via Pinfall (7:08)

The Analysis: This was the most “unreal” fight of the 2000s. Naz entered at a heavier 158 lbs, sacrificing speed for durability.

  • The Drama: Gonzalez nearly ended the fight early with a crushing pin, leaving the undefeated boxer visibly hurt for the first time in his career.

  • The Finish: Naz shocked the world by abandoning traditional boxing, utilizing Lucha Libre dropkicks to soften the Giant’s base. In a final, physics-defying moment, the Prince executed a high-flying Lucha finisher to pin the 7’6″ monster.

[[ CELEBRITY & ANALYST REACTION THREAD ]]

Joe Rogan (The “Truth-Seeker”):

“Did you see Naz? He was doing Hurricanranas! A world-class boxer just beat a 7-foot giant with Lucha Libre. If you told me this in April, I’d say you were high. But Butterbean? That wasn’t luck. That was a 400lb wrecking ball with wrestling fundamentals. The ‘Invaders’ are evolving, man. The WWF locker room should be terrified.”

Mike Tyson (Boxing Legend):

“Butterbean is a bad, bad man. He showed those wrestling guys that a punch is a punch, no matter how tall you are. And Naz? He’s got the heart of a lion. He went into the ‘Shadow’ and came out with the win. Boxing 2, WWF 0. Deal with it.”

The Rock (Indie Sensation):

“The Rock sees the Prince dancing. The Rock sees the Bean punching. It’s cute. But while they’re playing ‘Crossover,’ The Rock is getting ready to slap the face off a clown in June. You want ‘Electrifying’? Wait until the People’s Champion gets his hands on these ‘Invaders’ in the fall.”

[[ HELL IN A CELL: CHICAGO CARNAGE CARD ]]

Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, IL

Matchup Stipulation The “Heat” Level
Undertaker vs. Mick Foley Hell in a Cell 10/10 (The Rematch)
Shane McMahon vs. Kurt Angle UFC Rules 8/10 (Prove-it Match)
Ken Shamrock vs. Royce Gracie Non-Title Rematch 9/10 (Grudge)
Ultimate Warrior vs. Road Kill “Battle for the Name” 7/10 (Indie vs. Legend)

Special Report: Shane McMahon has officially relinquished his mandatory challenger status to focus on Kurt Angle. Shane-O-Mac claims the Shamrock win was “pure skill,” and he’s going into the Octagon-style cage with an Olympic gold medalist to prove he is the elite “McMahon Fighter.”

The Teenager Comment Section (2000s Era)

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

NAZ PINNED GONZALEZ?!?! 😱 My mind is blown. I thought the ‘Mountain’ was gonna sit on him. Boxing fans are gonna be so annoying on IRC tonight lol. But for real, Shane vs Kurt Angle under UFC rules? Shane is gonna get his limbs turned into pretzels. 🥨 Angle is 2-0 and he’s a machine. RIP Shane.

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    Shane has ‘Genetic Power’ though! He’s crazy enough to jump off the top of the cell. But yeah, Angle is scary. Also, Road Kill is an Australian punk? I saw his tapes on a LimeWire leak. He’s wild, but the Ultimate Warrior is gonna snort him like a pixie stick. 😤

User: HadoukenKid

Butterbean is a tank. He looks bigger than his 5’11 offiicial measurements, I think he is actually 6’3″ and Hang Man Choi only 6’11. You know how much these promoters inflate or deflate these numbers. Anyways🚜 Choi didn’t even know what hit him. If Bean keeps fighting every week, he’s gonna be 5-0 by July. Why isn’t he in the USA Tournament? Oh wait, I forgot—the Mafia wants Savage vs DiBiase. 🙄 They’re hiding the real killers in the Vegas cards. #FreeTheBean

User: Sk8er_Gurl_99

Undertaker vs Foley in Chicago… I’m literally shaking. 😭 Foley already lost in May, if he goes into the Cell he’s gonna end up in a wheelchair. This is the darkest timeline. I hope the ‘Deadman’ shows some mercy. 🕯️💀

[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: I’m working on getting the pre-match medical scans for Foley. The rumors say he’s already fighting with 3 broken ribs. Stay tuned. ]]

“The Most Electrifying Move in Sports History”

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

The May 2000 archive has been officially updated. While the “Boxing Invasion” ended in a cloud of legal paperwork and “Mafia” conspiracy theories, the squared circle provided enough electricity to power the entire South of Texas.

Here is the Post-Fight Historical Summary for the month that changed the “Indie” narrative forever.

WWF ARCHIVE: May 2000 “Collision of Worlds” Results

Author: Neil Kim Park (Senior Fight Historian)

1. The Electrifying Debut: The Rock vs. The Hurricane

Result: The Rock def. The Hurricane via Pinfall

The Finish: This was nearly the upset of the century. The Hurricane’s “Unorthodox” style—utilizing high-flying maneuvers that the 90s-peak legends weren’t prepared for—actually saw him land a pinfall attempt that the ref almost counted to three. The Rock looked gassed until the final minute.

In a moment described by ringside announcers as “the most electrifying move in sports history,” The Rock removed his elbow pad, tossed it into the crowd, ran the ropes twice, and delivered the People’s Elbow. The arena in San Antonio nearly shook apart. The “Secret Move” is no longer a secret; it’s a warning to Hogan.

2. The Family Legacy: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Eddie Guerrero

Result: Rey Mysterio Jr. def. Eddie Guerrero via Pinfall

The Analysis: Stepping in as a replacement for his father, the young Rey Mysterio Jr. proved that the “New Generation” isn’t just about strength—it’s about velocity. Eddie Guerrero, a technical master at his peak, couldn’t keep track of Rey’s 360-degree offense. This win cements the Mysterio name in the WWF hierarchy for the next decade.

3. The Fall of the Deadman: Mick Foley vs. The Undertaker

Result: Mick Foley def. The Undertaker via Pinfall (24:30)

The Shock: The “Deadman” has suffered his first sanctioned loss. Foley, the “Hardcore Icon,” absorbed a level of punishment that would have hospitalized a normal man.

  • The Question: The Hell in a Cell match was originally scheduled for the next round of the USA Contender tournament. With Foley winning, the Commission is scrambling. Fans are demanding a rematch, but the physical toll on both men might make a June Cell match impossible.

4. USA #1 Contender Semi-Final: The Million Dollar Advance

Result: Ted DiBiase def. Eric Bischoff via Submission (12:10)

The Finish: Bischoff’s months of “Black Belt” training were negated by DiBiase’s 90s-peak technical grappling. Once DiBiase locked in the Million Dollar Dream, Bischoff had no escape. DiBiase advances to the finals, looking more dominant than ever.

5. The Main Event: “Stone Cold” Steve Austin vs. Mr. McMahon

Location: Alamodome, San Antonio

Result: Steve Austin def. Vince McMahon via Pinfall

The Reality: The “Executive-turned-Combatant” experiment was more competitive than anyone expected. Vince McMahon, at 54, showed a “Genetic Power” that actually saw him counter Austin’s first two Stunner attempts.

The Controversy: While Vince gained respect from the locker room for his resilience, the underground forums are on fire. Critics claim Austin was “paid” by the McMahon estate to make the fight look competitive and protect the boss’s ego. Regardless, Austin walks out with his hand raised, but the “Mafia” rumors have never been louder.

The “Cancelled” Boxing Invasion

The high-profile bouts between Prince Naseem/Gonzalez and Butterbean/Choi have been officially pulled from the schedule due to “contractual disputes.”

  • The Theory: Underground analysts believe the promoters got cold feet after the Sagat/Ryu tape leaked. They realized that putting “Sports Icons” in a ring with “World Warriors” or WWF Giants was a recipe for a reputational disaster.

Updated June 1, 2000 Rankings

Fighter Record Status
The Rock 2 – 0 Top Contender (The People’s Champion)
Steve Austin 2 – 0 Unstoppable (But rumored “compromised”)
Kurt Angle 2 – 0 Dark Horse (Olympic Dominance)
Kimbo Slice 2 – 0 Brawl Specialist
Bob Sapp 2 – 0 Giant Killer

*** [ WWF_UNDERGROUND_FORUM ] *** Topic: MAY RESULTS MEGATHREAD: ROCK’S SECRET MOVE / TAKER PWNED? / VINCE LIVES??

[ ADMIN_NEIL ] – Posted: June 1, 2000 @ 10:25 AM

Yo, everyone! I hope your T1 lines were ready because the San Antonio results are absolutely insane. We’ve got new meta-moves, a legend falling, and the “Mafia” rumors hitting an all-time high with the boxing cancellation.

Check the feed below and keep the flame wars to a minimum. NO SPAMMING.

[[ THE POST-FIGHT CHAT LOG ]]

User: Xx_The_Great_One_xX

THE PEOPLE’S ELBOW IS THE BOMB DOT COM!! 💣🔥 Did you see the Hurricane’s face? He thought he had the upset pwned after surviving the Rock Bottom, but then Rock just… takes off the elbow pad? It was the most electrifying thing I’ve ever seen. Hurricane got served! The “Secret Move” is 100% legit. GG.

  • Reply: Indie_Watcher_00

    As if! 🙄 Hurricane actually pinned him and the ref was slow-counting. Rock is lucky he’s a “Mafia” favorite. The People’s Elbow is just a fancy elbow drop, let’s be real. Hurricane was the better fighter tonight. Boring!

User: Deadman_Fan_666

UNDERTAKER LOST. IM DONE. 💀 How does Mick Foley beat the Deadman? This has to be a script. Taker looked like he was moving in slow motion. If they don’t do a rematch at Hell in a Cell, I’m canceling my subscription and moving to Japan to watch K-1. Taker got robbed.

  • Reply: Hardcore_Mick_Fan

    Take a chill pill, emo kid. Foley is a beast! He took everything Taker threw and just kept smiling. It wasn’t a fluke, it was hardcore grit. Foley is the new king of the cellar. Taker is just “90s-Peak” and he can’t keep up with the “Cactus” energy. Deal with it! 🌵👊

User: Truth_Seeker_J

BOXING CANCELLED = WWF MAFIA CONFIRMED. 🕵️‍♂️ They knew Prince Naseem and Butterbean would expose the “Giants” as fakes. “Contractual reasons” my butt. Vince is just protecting the Hogan vs. Andre gate. They don’t want real strikers ruining the SummerSlam buy-rate. Follow the money, peeps.

  • Reply: Corporate_Shill_Hunter

    Or maybe Naz was just scared? Gonzalez is a mountain. Naz probably saw the Sagat scar tape and realized he didn’t want his chest opened up. 🤷‍♂️ The boxing guys are all talk. WWF is where the real monsters are.

User: Austin316Rawr

VINCE IS RIPPED?? WTH did I just watch? I thought Austin was going to squash him in 2 mins, but Vince was actually countering the Stunners? Respect to the old man, but Austin 3:16 still says I just pinned your boss! 🐍🍻

  • Reply: Real_Fight_Analyzer

    “Respect”?? Open your eyes! 🤡 Austin was obviously paid to make it look competitive. There is zero chance a 54-year-old CEO stays in the ring with a “Neural Shock” striker like Austin for 20 minutes unless it’s a total work. Vince is just buying “Combat Cred” so he can talk trash to the Street Fighters. Epic fail.

User: Mysterio_Goat

Rey Jr. is the future. 🐐 PWNING Eddie was sick. Bischoff’s training was weak sauce though. DiBiase is going to buy the USA belt at this rate. 💵

[[ CURRENT POLL: WAS AUSTIN PAID OFF? ]]

  • YES: 68% (The Mafia is real!)

  • NO: 32% (Vince is just built different.)

[[ ADMIN NOTE: The “Hell in a Cell” rumors for June are swirling. I’ll post the leaked brackets as soon as the T1 finishes the download. ]]

WWF ARCHIVE: June 2000 “Las Vegas Lockdown” Schedule

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

1. THE BOXING INVASION: Vegas Betting Odds (June 4)

The promoters have stopped the legal bickering. The fights are on for June 4th in Las Vegas. The “Sweet Science” is finally meeting the “WWF Giants” under BMF Rules.

Matchup Vegas Odds The “Street” Lean
Prince Naseem vs. Giant Gonzalez Gonzalez (-150) “Naz’s speed is a myth vs. a 7’6″ reach.”
Butterbean vs. Hongman Choi Butterbean (-110) “Bean’s overhand right is the equalizer.”

Note: Butterbean has signed a “Gauntlet Contract.” If he defeats Choi, he is scheduled to fight every single week in June to prove his 90s-peak dominance.

2. HELL IN A CELL: The Rematch of the Century

The Commission’s decision to replace Randy Savage with Mick Foley for the Cell match has sent shockwaves through the “Indie” community.

  • The Decision: Analysts believe the WWF is “protecting” the Savage/DiBiase final. By giving Savage a “bye” to the finals, they ensure a high-revenue technical match for the USA Belt.

  • The Risk: Putting The Undertaker and Mick Foley back in a cage after their May war is being called “medically irresponsible” by Joe Rogan. “You can’t expect Foley’s nervous system to handle another 20-foot drop,” Rogan stated on a recent pirate radio broadcast.

3. THE WCW EXODUS: Goldberg & Scott Hall

The “Mafia” rumors have shifted to the Monday Night War front.

  • Goldberg Negotiations: Word is the WWF is offering Goldberg a record-breaking “Undisputed” contract to jump ship.

  • Scott Hall: “The Bad Guy” has officially entered the WWF. WCW fans are trashing him on IRC channels, claiming he’s “ducking Goldberg” to join the safer WWF environment. Hall’s debut is expected to disrupt the mid-card rankings immediately.

4. THE RETURN OF THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR

In the most “90s-Peak” move possible, the Ultimate Warrior has issued an Open Challenge for June. He claims he’s here to “purify” the federation of the “Street Fighter” influence. Who will step up to the tassels?

The “Insult” Card: The Rock vs. Doink

The Rock is reportedly furious about his June 15th booking against Doink the Clown.

  • The Rock’s Quote: “The Rock didn’t invent the most electrifying move in sports history to entertain a clown. The Rock should be fighting Hogan, not dodging pies.”

  • The WWF Response: “Wait your turn. Andre and the winner of Savage/DiBiase are the priority.”

The Teenager Comment Section (2000s Era)

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

“TRIPLE H vs X-PAC on June 9? 😱 The Kliq is officially dead! DX is cannibalizing itself. HHH is gonna Pedigree X-Pac into the 19th century. Also, Stone Cold is ‘recovering’? More like he’s hiding because he knows he can’t beat a real warrior like Kurt Angle yet. 🤫”

  • Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

    “HHH is the Cerebral Assassin, he doesn’t have friends, he has victims. And shut up about Austin. He took 20 minutes of McMahon’s ‘Genetic Power’ and still won. Let him rest his neck before he Stunners your boy Savage in the finals.”

User: HadoukenKid

“Randy Savage gets a free pass to the finals while Foley and Taker kill each other in a cage? THE MAFIA IS REAL. 🕵️‍♂️ They want a ‘safe’ 90s legend like Savage or DiBiase holding the USA belt because they’re terrified of Ryu or Ken showing up and taking it. #JusticeForFoley”

  • Reply: 90s_Peak_Historian

    “Savage is the GOAT. He doesn’t need a ‘bye’ to win, but he earned it by being the most dependable draw in history. You ‘Street Fighter’ kids are just mad because your hobo hero isn’t on the June poster. Go back to your dirt pits.”

User: MMA_Junky_Ken

Ken Shamrock in the Hell in a Cell undercard??? If he fights a ‘Real’ wrestler, it’s over. Shamrock has been training in the UFC pits. If he gets a leg-lock on someone in June, they aren’t walking until August. 🦶🔒

The New Power Trio: The Unseen Leaders of the WWF

Posted on by Maria Cristina Aguillera

The WWF hierarchy is currently undergoing a massive shift that has nothing to do with “Stone Cold” or the World Warriors. While the spotlight has been focused on Hogan’s collision course with Andre, a trio of “Dark Horse” fighters has quietly been amassing a win-loss record that rivals the top of the card.

As of May 2000, three names have surged to the top of the standings, and each represents a different, terrifying philosophy of combat.

1. Kimbo Slice: The Street-Brawler Supreme

Record: 2-0 (Tied for Lead)

Kimbo Slice is the physical embodiment of the “No Rules” era. He arrived in January with a reputation from the underground backyard circuits and immediately proved his hands are made of stone.

  • Jan 14 vs. Hongman Choi: In a clash of size versus raw aggression, Kimbo took on the “Korean Monster.” Under BMF (Baddest Mother-Fighter) Rules, Kimbo utilized his head-movement to negate Choi’s massive reach, eventually landing a overhand right that resulted in a clinical Knockout.

  • April 22 vs. Rey Zulu Jr.: Switching to Pro-Wrestling Rules, Kimbo showed he isn’t just a striker. He managed to pin the powerhouse Zulu Jr. in a display of explosive grappling that stunned the “Indie” scouts.

2. Kurt Angle: The Olympic Machine

Record: 2-0 (Tied for Lead)

If Kimbo is the street, Kurt Angle is the lab. The 1996 Gold Medalist has adapted to the WWF’s unified landscape faster than any athlete in history. He doesn’t just win; he dismantles.

  • March 25 vs. R-Truth: Angle demonstrated his technical superiority by forcing the agile R-Truth into a Submission win, proving that “Indie” speed is no match for Olympic-grade wrestling.

  • April 8 vs. Steven Seagal: In perhaps the most controversial match of the spring, Angle faced the Aikido master under UFC Rules. While Seagal attempted to use redirection, Angle utilized a “Shoot” style to bypass the defense, delivering a high-velocity strike that resulted in a Knockout. This win silenced those who believed the “Action Stars” were untouchable.

3. Bob Sapp: The “Beast” of the Super-Heavyweights

Record: 2-0 (Tied for Lead)

Bob Sapp is the “X-Factor” of the Super-Heavyweight division. Standing at 350 lbs of pure muscle, he fights with a level of “Primal Rage” that has terrified the veteran locker room.

  • Jan 14 vs. Giant Gonzalez: While Hogan was being “protected,” Sapp was in the ring with the 7’6″ Gonzalez under BMF Rules. In a display of sheer force, Sapp became the first man to Knockout the Giant, proving that height means nothing if you can’t survive the Beast’s initial charge.

  • April 1 vs. Teila Tuli: Sapp continued his rampage by knocking out the legendary Sumotori Teila Tuli. The match lasted less than three minutes, establishing Sapp as the most dangerous “Sanctioned Monster” in the WWF.

The Current Rankings: The Race for SummerSlam

Fighter Win Count Key Victim Combat Style
Hulk Hogan 2 Yokozuna Power Wrestling
Andre the Giant 2 Unknown (Territory Bouts) Super Heavyweight
Kimbo Slice 2 Hongman Choi Backyard/Street
Kurt Angle 2 Steven Seagal Olympic/UFC Style
Bob Sapp 2 Giant Gonzalez Primal BMF

The Historian’s Take: The Convergence

The Commission is in a tight spot. They want the Hogan vs. Andre finals to be the “Main Event,” but they cannot ignore the statistics. Kimbo, Angle, and Sapp are 2-0 and have faced legitimate world-class threats while Hogan has been fighting “Legacy” matches.

If the WWF is truly an “Undisputed” federation, one of these three should be standing across from the winner of SummerSlam.