THE “BUTTERBEAN” BLITZ: JUNE CONQUEST AND THE CONTRACT CRISIS

Yo! The month of June was supposed to be the “Summer of the Bean,” but it turned into a month of controversy, “ducking,” and some of the most bizarre matchups in WWF history. Eric “Butterbean” Esch was ready to fight every week, but the WWF locker room—especially the grapplers—seemed to have a sudden case of “stage fright.”

Here is the breakdown of Butterbean’s chaotic June campaign and why the “King of the 4-Rounders” might be reconsidering his signature on that weekly contract.

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[[ JUNE 1-7: THE SILENT TREATMENT ]]

Following his dominant win over the giant Hong Man Choi, the WWF sanctioned a “Match a Week” challenge for Bean.

• The Reality: Week 1 was a total wash. Despite the odds being split 50/50 among the fans, the WWF roster stayed quiet. Rumor has it the technical grapplers—afraid of that legendary overhand right—refused to sign the bout agreements. The first match was cancelled due to “No Willing Opponents.”

[[ JUNE 18: THE LEGENDARY STRUGGLE ]]

Opponent: Benny “The Jet” Urquidez (Age 47)

• The Vibe: An aging Benny Joe stepped up when nobody else would. Under Pro Wrestling rules, it looked like a mismatch, but the kickboxing legend actually had Bean in trouble early with his speed and leg kicks.

• The Turning Point: Bean realized he couldn’t win a stand-up battle with a legend. He switched gears, using his 400lb frame to lift and throw Benny like a sack of potatoes.

• The Finish: A stunned Benny Joe was caught by a massive hook before Bean secured the pin. A “walk in the park” turned into a legitimate dogfight.

[[ JUNE 25: THE KUNG FU CRISIS ]]

Opponent: Gen (Age 60s)

• The Context: Gen, fresh off an upset KO win over Benny Joe in April, challenged Bean under Pro Wrestling rules.

• The Match: The martial arts master showed flashes of his old “jumping kung fu” style, but age had slowed him down.

• The Finish: Bean played it smart, absorbing the lighter strikes and waiting for an opening. One devastating power-punch followed by a heavy-weight pin ended the night.

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[[ THE EXPERTS WEIGH IN ]]

Analyst	Quote / Reaction
Joe Rogan	“People are making fun of Bean for fighting 60-year-olds, but did you see the throws he used on Benny Joe? That’s high-level adaptation. He’s evolving into a pro wrestler in real-time. It’s absolutely ‘tight’!”
Jim Lampley	“BANG! Butterbean is taking on the ghosts of martial arts past! He’s the ultimate wrecking ball, but you have to wonder—how long can a 400lb man sustain a match every single week?”
Quinito Henson	“Bean is proving that ‘Heft is Might’ in the WWF. He’s taking the ‘Sporting Chance’ by fighting legends, but the real test will be a younger, faster grappler who isn’t afraid of the power.”
Oscar De La Hoya	“It’s a circus. Butterbean is a boxer, and he’s out here wrestling grandpas? It’s a side-show. He needs to get back in a ring with someone his own age or hang it up.”
Bob Arum	“The WWF is milking the cow until it’s dry. A match every week? It’s a death wish. Bean is smart—he hasn’t signed that extension yet, and if he’s wise, he’ll demand ‘Quality over Quantity’.”

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[[ THE FUTURE: THE CONTRACT & POTENTIAL FOES ]]

Will he sign the “1 Match Per Week” Contract?

Word backstage is that Bean is hesitant. While he’s winning, the toll on his body is showing, and fighting smaller, older legends isn’t helping his “BMF” reputation with the hardcore fans. He wants “Real Meat” on the menu.

Potential July Opponents:

1. Sagat: The dream match. Muay Thai vs. Boxing power.

2. Mark Hunt: The “Super Samoan” is reportedly in talks for a K-1/WWF hybrid match.

3. The Big Show: The ultimate size test. Can Bean lift a 500lb giant like he did Benny Joe?

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[[ THE THREAD: THE BEAN DEBATE ]]

User: Xx_NWO_For_Life_xX

BENNY JOE HURT BEAN?! 🦵 That just shows that kickboxing is the ultimate counter. I love Bean, but he’s lucky Benny is 47 and not 27. If he fights a prime striker, he’s going to sleep.

• Reply: Raw_Is_War_2000

  Gen winning in his 60s against Benny was the real shocker of April. 🥋 Seeing Bean pin him was predictable, but the match was actually competitive for a few minutes! I want to see Bean vs. Birdie in Dallas. Let the big men swing chains!

User: HadoukenKid

De La Hoya is just salty because Bean is making more money in the WWF than most boxers make in a year. 🕶️ But Arum is right—one match a week is too much. One injury and the “Bean Conquest” is over.

User: BeefSlammer69

GIVE ME BEAN VS SAGAT!! 👊😤 I don’t want to see any more Kung Fu masters. I want to see a Tiger Knee vs a 400lb Hook. That’s the only match that matters!

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[[ ADMIN_NEIL NOTE: I’m hearing that Bean’s camp is demanding a “Safety Clause” before signing the July contract. If the WWF can’t find young fighters willing to step up, we might see the end of the weekly Bean-streak. Stay tuned! ]]